When we were starting Concierge Auctions, an early potential investor said to me that I was “too nice to be in business.” Over 10 years later it’s something to laugh about and something I use to inspire other business leaders but at the time, I took it seriously. 

Is there such a thing as too nice in business? Do we necessarily have to be mean to get what we want? Certainly at the time that this potential investor made this statement, I had been involved in countless negotiations as one of the top-producing luxury real estate agents in Florida. Not every transaction goes smoothly but I believed then, and believe today that nice opens doors. At that time, I rejected the characterization that I was too nice to run a company. I believed it was possible to be successful by working hard and dealing with people fairly. 

Over the years, I’ve learned that what this potential investor saw as a liability is actually a strength. I’m not alone; the business climate has shifted over the last decade. As technology advances, emotional intelligence is becoming more valued as an advantage in the workplace. Mark Cuban said in 2018 that “one of the most underestimated skills in business is being nice.” 

Nice is also a super power because nice, by its very nature is adaptable. One of the greatest leadership tools is the ability to be flexible. The day you stop learning from the people you lead is the day your business starts to decay. The nicer you are to your team, the more they want to be part of your mission. Right from the beginning, developing culture was one of our core jobs and that has continued as we’ve expanded. 

Our business can be intense. There are long hours, plenty of travel, and also a lot of tense moments with millions of dollars on the line. What sustains me and sustains our team is the sense that we are all in this together. We are kind to each other when things are going well and equally kind when they are not. Sometimes we just need to have fun and do things like bringing in puppies for an afternoon of play. Our goal is to understand the needs of our teams and satisfy those within the workplace making work an exciting place to be. 

Nice is open. When we decided to shift our company to open book financials there was a lot of concern. That level of openness can be jarring at first because it is very different than traditional business. We made the change partly because as a luxury real estate marketplace, transparency is core to our brand. We built our company around the idea that the traditional system of real estate could be improved, why wouldn’t we take that spirit of innovation to our own business?

What we learned is that transparency is accountability but it is also responsibility. It became an opportunity not just to show our books to the company but to explain why decisions were made. The conversations were teaching moments for all of us as we navigated a shared language of EBITDA and estimated costs. Staying open isn’t just a one time decision, it’s a commitment to constantly and consistently operate by a set of principles. 

Nice is kindness to others. One of the biggest moves we’ve made is tying each sale to a donation to Giveback Homes. We’ve turned a donation into a mission that guides our entire organization. Recently our team worked on five houses in El Salvador, part of an entire community that we have built. We’ve sent employees on multiple trips and most of our core leadership has also gone on the trips and built homes side-by-side with volunteers. It may not make business sense on paper but the benefits to our company have been extraordinary. The most exciting thing has been getting our sellers engaged in the project as well. Being nice has an ability to build on itself, inspiring others. 

Nice doesn’t solve everything and no one is nice all the time. We all have to make difficult and painful decisions in business are inevitable, however, when we approach from the place of nice first, negotiations tend to go more smoothly and people tend to lower their defenses and truly engage.